Depression - How can I help?

[ave]

I know this is a very difficult and complex topic, but I a friend of mine has recently told me that he suffers from depression. It doesn't seem to have an obvious reason... his family is intact, he studies a lot and is good at it, he's not in a relationship but has many friends. He just told me that he's always sad and just started a therapy and had eventually been diagnosed with depression. Because he's a very good friend and I know about the gravity that depression can have on your life, I was wondering if anyone has any experiences with friends or family members who are seriously depressed (as a sickness).

He's a good guy and one of my closer friends, so I'd really like to help and support him as far as I can. Is there anything I could do? He's not up to any adventures like barhopping or hiking because of his studies and to be honest neither am I because of time constraints. Anything meaningful one could do as an outsider?

[bobzee]

If he's started therapy then that's a step in the right direction. It's hard to give specific advice without knowing what the cause is. Let him know that if he needs to talk about anything, you'll be there.

Just being a good friend goes a long way.

[ASSEMbler]

He should find a therapist.

Depression has many reasons, many are subconsious and some are biological or chemical in nature.

If you take certain birth control, or acne medication it can cause severe depression.

Examine medications first, then seek council.

[APE]

Medication is a good short term help for some people, I've known people who react well and others who react badly to various types of anti-depressants. Most people I know who get depressed are just in a crappy place in life and this economy sure doesn't help.

A therapist works well.

[graciano1337]

Just be a good friend and be there when they need it. Otherwise I'd probably just let the therapist do their job.

[HEX1GON]

Be supportive, and a good listener. You're saying you're both good friends, so that will also help him.

As others have said, he's stepping in the right direction by seeking help from a therapist.

[sayin999]

I've had major depression and still deal with it from time to time and honestly there's no specific fix it can be a lot of things. Therapist is a good start though. Just try to take any moody behavior in stride and try not to force them to be good mood if they are down.

[karsten]

my personal suggestion after helping out a friend, is being there for him.

call him almost everyday, plan things togheter at least 2-3 days a week, try to bring him to places with other people or outside his home. I.e. plan a gaming session at your home not his, chat, listen to him etc.

He'll get better. Good friends are better than any medicine.

[XerdoPwerko]

As someone who has struggled with major depression several times, and still has recurrent depressive tendencies, I can tell you that support, help, and sharing common activities that have meaning and enjoyment are the best ways to help.

A depressed person will sometimes wonder why his or her friends are there, what they see, or if it's all real, but once it sinks in, they will feel awesome (as much as possible within the condition anyhow).

Really - good friends, good memories, good experience, those help a depressed person a lot, beside therapy - which is indispensable.

As long as your friend knows you're there, and you share good experiences, your help will be greatly useful.

I am also glad to see that this forum has none of that "man up, you sissy bastard" or "you're just lazy, my problems are worse" - that many internet places tend to pelt depressed users with. This makes me less hateful of mankind.

[GodofHardcore]

Somebody ask for a Psychologist?

[billcosbymon]

I had some really serious depression a few years back and I pretty much lost all sense of reality because my best friend killed himself. He definitely chose the right route with therapy, it really helped me a lot having someone there that will always listen to you. And what also helped me out a lot was talking to the priest at my church about my situation.

[spot778]

Agree with everyone in saying engage this person, talk to them etc... even if you don't do anything in person keep them talking.

[Padoca85]

Ive been in depression for about 6 years, with highs and low, just really getting out of it now.

Most of the times people have depression its because something is bothering him, this could be ANYTHING, from the fell of loniless of not having a girlfriend, parents or friends. A child trauma. A low future perpective for himself. Being persecuted in scholl or work, anything. And its really hard to people open themself about those thing, doesnt help if its something old, as its builds up more sadness and depression and gets even harder to talk to someone about it.

Theres other reason like biological and medicine like Assembler said, but from my experience with other people are generally something they are not happy about that builds more and more.

Agree to what karsten said. Try to be a good friend, and invite him out, keep contact, etc. It helps a lot.

But he will only start to get better when he really wants to change the situation hes in. Takes ALOT of willpower.

[GodofHardcore]

Every one is giving some good advice I'll be on my way then.

Psychology man AWAY *woosh*

[HEX1GON]

Ive been in depression for about 6 years, with highs and low, just really getting out of it now.

It's a long and lengthy process :/ I seem to have really weird pattern with my depression, I haven't had it for that long but it happens now and then and sometimes for a long time.

Mainly when the day ends that's when I feel it... Well time heals most pains.

[la-li-lu-le-lo]

I basically agree with what's already been said. I've experienced depression, and it sucks. What ultimately helped me was medication. After taking medication, I ended up being more social which also improved my mood. I think it also has something to do with the way you think about the world. Having a positive outlook on life can make you feel better. What ultimately keeps me going is just thinking about all the cool things in the world - all the cool things all around me, and all the cool things I've still yet to experience. If you have a positive outlook on life, sharing that outlook with a person who's depressed or helping them find an outlook for themselves can be helpful.

I think stress can also contribute to depression. Sometimes stress is something you can't avoid, but sometimes people try to do too much and make stress for themselves. Some people are just easily stressed-out (I'm one of those people). Anyway, reducing stress, any way you can, can also help with depression.